A day in the life...

Grasshoppers

2007-05-13T17:21:00.001-06:00

So as you may or may not know, I'm not a big fan of bugs.

I left my grandma's house this morning feeling less than chipper, with Tyler and Austin in tow. We stop by Dunkin' Donuts to get them some munchkins and head north on the parkway when Tyler screams, "MOMMY, THERE'S A HUGE BUG IN YOUR CAR"! Great, I think, as I look over to check out the bug. He's pretty much right on. There was a HUGE black and yellow grasshopper the size of a small bird (ok, so maybe I exaggerate a little) on the passenger side seatbelt. Knowing there was not a lot I was going to do about this situation driving 70 down the highway, I pull off on the shoulder. I open the passenger side door to have this rodent staring me right in the eyes, preparing to lunge at me at any time. I asked Austin if he would please flick if off the seatbelt out of the car. He refuses. He's bawling his head off. Tyler is in panic mode (and I can't say that I'm not either), but all I can do is stand at the side of the highway and laugh. Hysterically. Pretty much because my hair is a wreck, I'm wearing a marathon shirt, jeans and slippers, and look like death warmed over.

So I prepare to catch this creature when I look over and see a State Trooper pull up next to me, however facing southbound in the grass. He's pretty cute and looks to be about my age. He walks over and of course I start laughing harder. He probably thought I was on drugs. He asked if I needed help and of course I say yeah, I do. I have a huge grasshopper on my passenger side seatbelt and can't get it out. He laughs, says he's had the same thing happen, gets it out and saves the day. In the meantime, Tyler in the backseat yells out "hey, do you want....(ok, disclaimer here...you can't make this shit up)...a DONUT"????? (Yes...he says this to the cop) I slam the door quickly and laugh it off...Trooper also laughs and says "no, that's the Sheriff's Office"! Too funny.

Ok, so I call my friend Marria who is working at the Tampa FHP office and tell her the story. She wants to know who the trooper is so she sends out a mass email asking who just assisted the woman with the grasshopper. Said trooper responds and she tells me who it is. Well, without going into too many names I said...is that (insert name here)? She says yeah, why? Hmm, funny story. You see, I came to Florida in 1992 for spring break when I was 16 (yeah, I'm showing my age a little bit) and ended up meeting (instert trooper name here) and kissed him at a party!!!

Funny how things work out, isn't it?

I guess it's time to blog again, huh?

2007-05-09T06:57:00.000-06:00

It's crazy how much has changed since November 26th, 2006 when I posted my last blog.

I'm sure my loyal readers (ha ha, had to say it) have lost interest, after all it has been nearly 6 months since I've posted.

For those that don't know, I realized on Thanksgiving weekend I was going to get a divorce. After a last ditch effort to try to work things out, basically in all of december, we threw the towel in and made the final decision.

Although December was a productive month- we talked more in a month than we did during the last 6 years of our 8 1/2 year marriage- we decided divorce was the best option for us.

Chris and I are now very good friends (well, most of the time- hee hee) and will remain that way, not only for our children, but for the sake of year's passed.

I'll update more soon- I'm sure I have a story or two to tell!

In the meantime, you can find me on myspace at www.myspace.com/prumomma

xoxo

Request

2006-11-26T06:14:00.000-07:00

I know I haven't blogged in a really, really long time, but life has been busy and a little bit crazy lately.

For those of you who pray, please keep me in your prayers. I've got some issues going on right now that I'm not ready to go into, but if you would just pray that things go as planned.

Thanks!

~kp~

Crazy Girls @ Starbucks

2006-10-30T07:13:00.000-07:00

So Jody, Samantha, Lily and I went to Starbucks last night. We do this occasionally on Sunday nights for some girl time. Just time to act silly without anyone knowing or judging us!

We wanted to take some pictures inside, but the clerk wouldn't let us- so we went out side trying to take pictures of ourselves. It wans't very easy! That's when this old man walks up to us. We asked him if he would mind taking a picture for us, which he agrees. He takes the pictures and asks if I want to see it. That is a bad request, because he could end up standing there for 15 minutes retaking pictures that I don't like. I told him the picture he took would be fine, thank him and take my camera back. I looked at the picture he sent and here's what I saw:

The girls and I were laughing so hard, hoping he just couldn't see the LCD screen on my camera instead of thinking this was a dirty old man taking pictures! It was so funny, we couldn't even stand for another picture without being goofy!

I'll update in a little bit with some more pictures from that eventful evening!

I know, I know

2006-10-10T14:51:00.000-06:00

I'm a slacker and haven't blogged lately. Actually, it would appear that it's been a month, today. So, here I am.

I'm still alive, doing well, thank you for asking.

Everyday I continue to learn new things, meet new people, remember old faces. I like life, at this point.

No, I'm not a recovering brain surgery patient. Thanks anyway.

Earthquake?

2006-09-10T18:18:00.000-06:00

Earthquake?

I'm laying on the couch at 10:53 this morning when I hear my front windows rattling. If a very large truck drives by my windows will rattle. A year or so ago a neighbor fired off a round from a shotgun- my windows rattled then. Otherwise, my windows usually don't rattle.

I look out the window (this was a task, because I was not about to get my ass off the couch) to see what, if anything I could see, but there's nothing. Chris is standing at the table getting ready to go on his third segment of the church detail and I notice the plant leaves are shaking. Now all of this has occurred within a matter of 30 seconds, maybe. Then, I start to feel the couch shake. I looked at Chris and said "the couch is shaking, I hope we're not on a sinkhole". Tyler says "yeah, my couch is shaking too". Then it got worse...nothing too obvious, but enough that I knew there was a strong vibration in the couch, plant was moving, Chris noticed it. He said, "oh it's probably just an earthquake". "Yeah, ok- we don't have earthquakes in Florida", I lovingly replied.

So- it could have been a sinkhole, but I think it was an earthquake- plus, I'm not the only one who noticed this...not that I would ever admit Chris was right.

Age Guage

2006-08-18T08:13:00.000-06:00

You said your birthday is 5 / 29 / 1976 which means you are 30 years old and about:

59 years 7 months younger than Walter Cronkite, age 89
54 years 11 months younger than Nancy Reagan, age 85
52 years 0 months younger than George Herbert Bush, age 82
44 years 8 months younger than Barbara Walters, age 74
42 years 6 months younger than Larry King, age 72
36 years 4 months younger than Ted Koppel, age 66
32 years 11 months younger than Geraldo Rivera, age 63
29 years 11 months younger than George W. Bush, age 60
24 years 10 months younger than Jesse Ventura, age 55
20 years 7 months younger than Bill Gates, age 50
15 years 9 months younger than Cal Ripken Jr., age 45
9 years 11 months younger than Mike Tyson, age 40
5 years 10 months younger than Jennifer Lopez, age 36
0 years 5 months younger than Tiger Woods, age 30
6 years 1 month older than Prince William, age 24

and that you were:

25 years old at the time of the 9-11 attack on America
23 years old on the first day of Y2K
21 years old when Princess Diana was killed in a car crash
18 years old at the time of Oklahoma City bombing
18 years old when O. J. Simpson was charged with murder
16 years old at the time of the 93 bombing of the World Trade Center
14 years old when Operation Desert Storm began
13 years old during the fall of the Berlin Wall
9 years old when the space shuttle Challenger exploded
7 years old when Apple introduced the Macintosh
7 years old during Sally Ride's travel in space
4 years old when Pres. Reagan was shot by John Hinckley, Jr.
3 years old at the time the Iran hostage crisis began
not yet 1 year old on the U.S.'s bicentennial Fourth of July

http://www.frontiernet.net/~cdm/age1.html

A day of triumph and sadness.

2006-08-16T17:11:00.000-06:00

JonBenet Ramsey's murderer was arrested today in Bangkok. What a HUGE weight lifted off the shoulders of her family. For what, ten years her death was unsolved? And to think that JonBenet's mother passed away within the past couple of months never knowing the fate of her daughters' case.

The Ramsey family sent a plant to the Lunsford family during the disappearance of Jessica.

A tear shed for the Ramseys. Point scored for the good guys.

Today was interesting.

2006-08-16T17:08:00.000-06:00

I took a leap off the deep end today and decided to have Tracy put some red highlights (yes, red) in my hair. I actually really like it, she did good. It's got just enough blonde in it to last the rest of the summer and red to bring in the fall. Yes, I'm a dork- I like my haircolor to match the seasons. Maybe it's part of my OCD. Not really sure. So I head over to the south west side of the county to meet with a lady that I sorda feel sorry for (yes, I do have a somewhat compassionate side) and got hit in the ass by some chick. I was in my agency vehicle and was attempting to get out to determine my damage when she bursts into tears and breaks into this story about not having any insurance. Great... So, I tell her to pull into the gas station to get out of the middle of the road and wait for the deputy that just passed me to write a report. He stroked her--Tango 1 x2. Ok, so in English all that means is she got 2 tickets, one for no insurance and the other for improper turn. She turned out of a parking lot and hit me. Dumbass. So, that's all the excitement for today. Tune in tomorrow for more fun stories from the files of Kelly. HA HA.

Melissa & Tyler

2006-08-10T18:28:00.000-06:00

Tyler's First Day of School

2006-08-10T18:27:00.000-06:00

Austin's First Day of School

2006-08-10T18:25:00.000-06:00

Happy Anniversary To Me!

2006-08-08T09:32:00.000-06:00

Exactly 8 years ago today I was married to my wonderful husband, Christopher.

xoxo

Background on the chicken cutlets

2006-08-08T09:06:00.000-06:00

I can't find my original post about the chicken cutlets so I'm going to repost it to the best of my memory.

In May of 2005 Melissa and I got invited to a black tie fundraiser for a local child advocacy center. The dress I planned on wearing was a very elegant long black sparkly dress- but it was strapless. The problem with that is I'm barely a "B" cup which means strapless doesn't look so hot on! Although breast augmentation would have been my ideal choice I did the much cheaper option and opted for silicone breast enhancers. Finding them was a whole new issue. A little more backgorund: A year or so prior to this incident we had a shooting involving a young boy that I responded to. My mom happened to be with me and asked who the "little boy" was wearing the green sheriff's office uniform. I explained to her that "little boy" was a deputy (not an explorer) and he was only a year or so younger than me. Since then I've teased this particular deputy about being a little boy- until the fateful day of my shopping excursion!

So I roll up to Walmart on a mission. I know exactly what I'm looking for and where to go in the store to find these silicone cutlets. I head back to the lingerie department and BINGO- there's the box with a nearly bare chested woman with these handy cutlets attached. The box clearly says "Looks and Feels Like The Real Thing"! PERFECT, must buy them! So, I meander around the store looking for my husband, carrying the box containing the bare breasted woman in my hand when I run into "little boy". My blondeness comes out in full force, because I forget I have the cutlets in my hand as I'm talking in the most dramatic way of ways (like I sometimes do), flailing my arms and all. Pretty soon I see him with this look on his face- this look of partial embarassment for him, partial for me. It was at that time I realized I'm holding a box of FAKE BOOBS that have become the object of attention, due to my flailing. All he could say is...who's little now? Since then, this deputy is known by his first name, Antoine instead of "little boy".

Because you all must know this.

2006-08-07T09:21:00.000-06:00

I'm sure I posted a year or so ago about buying the chicken cutlets, right? You know, those silicone like things that you strategically place inside your bra to make you appear, well, fuller! Well if I didn't I will, but I'm too lazy to look for the post now, maybe another time. Anyway- Most of the time I will use them with a tube top or something similar to enhance my bustline but for whatever reason, one may never know, I decided to wear them to Rob's birthday party Saturday. All was well until as Melissa, Beth, Ronda and I are dancing and one falls out. Now, for ever and a day I've joked around about this happening but never really thought it would., until I look down and notice I have something that resembles a breast stuck to my stomach, under my shirt. I lift up my shirt, exposing my stomach and sure enough, I have a chicken cutlet stuck to my belly. I guess my 3 'friends' thought it was the funniest thing in the world and didn't really want to tell me about it nor help me out of that situation. Thanks friends! :-P

New Quote

2006-08-07T09:20:00.000-06:00

I heard this the other day and laughed out loud.

"Stop the world! I'm getting off!"

Teen Buzz

2006-08-04T07:28:00.000-06:00

I got this from Hazel Eyez's blog. It's very interesting and a little spooky! It's a ringtone that has such a high frequency that only kids hear it. Reason being, as we age we lose the ability to hear certain frequencies. The frequency of this ringtone just happens to be one of the frequencies I've lost! CBS did a test at a Cingular Wireless tstore to see who could hear it and who can't. Believe it or not, no one over the age of 26 could hear it! The tone is called "Teen Buzz". Here it is, try for yourself!

http://www.wrgb.com/audio/atc_teenbuzz.mp3

And for the record, I just asked Jessica our 20 year old receptionist to come in and listen to it to see what she heard. She said she could hear a high pitched ringing noise! I could hear something high pitched but it wasn't any identifiable sound and that was concentrating and listening to it 3 different times!

Something else I'm proud of...

2006-08-03T17:56:00.000-06:00

My youngest stepdaughter Melissa got her learner's permit and is able to drive with an adult now, so if you're anywhere in Southern lower Michigan stay off the roads!

My oldest stepdaughter Mandy got a new job at TCF bank in Chelsea. She begins next week and with her major in accounting the promotion possibilities seem endless!

Congrats girls! Love ya!

Something to be proud of

2006-08-03T17:40:00.001-06:00

First, let me start by apologizing for not blogging like I should be. I really don't have much of an excuse either, other than I've also been blogging (nothing interesting, just meme's and stuff) on Myspace. Man, that place can sure be addictive! I've found so many people, and so many people have found me, it's like a reunion of sorts.

Anyway, this song I'm posting the lyrics of is one of my favorites right now. It's old, I know, but recently I've taken a likin' to it! (That's Florida lingo, by the way.) So, I'm posting the lyrics because in so many different ways I can picture the story in this song being told, but mostly I can see my Grandpa Green and Uncle Emmett, who both have passed, talking in the sense of this song. Actually, quite ironically my Grandpa and Uncle were both in the Navy and passed each other in Pearl Harbor. They were on seperate ships and both just happened to be standing along the outside rail when their ships passed and were able to share a wave and a tear. Thankfully, I was able to know both of them, though I was just a kid when Grandpa passed away, but neither of them died in the war. I kinda miss my Grandpa when I hear this song. Here it is...

There's a story that my daddy tells religiously
Like clockwork every time he sees an opening
In a conversation about the way things used to be
Well I'd just roll my eyes and make a bee-line for the door
But I'd always wind up starry-eyed, cross-legged on the floor
Hanging on to every word
Man, the things I heard

It was harder times and longer days
Five miles to school, uphill both ways
We were cane switch raised, and dirt floor poor
'Course that was back before the war
Yeah, your uncle and I made quite a pair
Flying F-15's through hostile air
He went down but they missed me by a hair
He'd always stop right there and say...

That's something to be proud of
That's a life you can hang your hat on
That's a chin held high as the tears fall down
A gut sucked in, a chest stuck out
Like a small town flag a-flyin'
Or a newborn baby cryin'
In the arms of the woman that you love
That's something to be proud of

So I'm graduatin' college, that was mama's dream
But I was on my way to anywhere else when I turned 18
Cuz when you gotta fast car you think you've got everything
I learned quick those GTO's don't run on faith
I ended up broken down in some town north of L.A.
Working maximum hours for minimum wage
Well, I fell in love, next thing I know
The babies came, the car got slow
I sure do miss that old hot rod
But you sure save gas in them foreign jobs
Dad, I wonder if I ever let you down
If you're ashamed how I turned out
Well, he lowered his voice, then he raised his brow
Said, lemme tell ya right now

That's something to be proud of
That's a life you can hang your hat on
You don't need to make a million
Just be thankful to be workin'
If you're doing what you're able
And putting food there on the table
And providing for the family that you love
That's something to be proud of
And if all you ever really do is the best you can
Well, you did it man

That's something to be proud of
That's a life you can hang your hat on
That's a chin held high as the tears fall down
A gut sucked in, a chest stuck out
Like a small town flag a-flyin'
Or a newborn baby cryin'
In the arms of the woman that you love
That's something to be proud of
That's something to be proud of
Yeah, that's something to be proud of
That's something to be proud of
Now that's something to be proud of

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SAMANTHA!

2006-07-25T17:25:00.000-06:00

Proof that I'm cool...

2006-07-25T15:46:00.000-06:00

I'm only half retarded...

2006-07-23T19:34:00.000-06:00

So I decided to be a nice person and mow the front lawn- well, actually Chris said not to mow the back because he didn't want me to run over the pool---no, I'm not lying, you can't make this shit up. So I go out the back slider to the shed to get the lawnmower, only to realize that big resin pond in my back yard replaced the shed. DUURRRR. So, I guess that explains why he didn't want me to mow the back yard.

Redneck Woman

2006-07-20T09:04:00.000-06:00

Me redneck roots are coming out in this story. In all of the years (I sound like I'm this pro or something-ha ha) that I have packed a can of Copenhagen (due to an ex-boyfriend ions ago) I have NEVER, EVER had the cap fall off. My friend Jason asked me to bring him his can, so out of habit I grab it and attempt to pack it. As I walk it over towards my pool he tells me to make sure the cap is on it. I roll my eyes, like that would ever happen, and continue to walk it over to him while packing it. Well all of the sudden I look down to see this black, tobacco like substance all over my chest, in my swimsuit top, down the front of my belly, all over my right arm...well, you get the picture. It was bad. The cap came off---whole can of chew allllll over me. Yuck. It was the grossest thing ever. Jason, not amused at this point, has an empty can of Copenhagen...so what does he do? He gets his dip off my chest, swimsuit top, towel that I had warpped around my waist, belly, etc... I sorda felt bad...well not really. But, it was pretty funny.

Driving Directions

2006-07-19T06:51:00.000-06:00

During hurricane season a couple of years ago when we got hit by like 4 storms in the same year I gave my map book away to a Sgt. who would probably need it more than me. Well, needless to say I never got it back, so I drive around mapless. That's ok though, it's just as easy to call into dispatch when I need directions somewhere rather than try to look it up in a map, especially when it's rather urgent.

So I get called out this morning for a death. The Sgt. who calls me gives me directions. Without being too identifying, here's what he said. Go down main country road, around curve to 3rd street on left. Turn left, go down 2 stop signs, turn right where you will see my car. He tells me it will take me 5 minutes, max, to get there. Fine. I'm enroute. I follow the directions he tells me, go to the 2nd stop sign, turn right and see a patrol car. I pull in the driveway and walk to the house.

Me: Knock Knock (thinking it's odd that the deputy isn't waiting outside fore me, as they usually do.
Kid: (Opens door about 3 inches) Yah?
Me: Umm, is the deputy here?
Kid: No.
Me: Okayyyy? Where did he go?
Kid: Umm, I'm not sure, I think to Powell Square.
Me: Where?
Kid: Powell Auto Parts
Me: Oh...ok (now I'm completely and thoroughly confused...isn't there a dead person inside, I'm thinking?). Now, as I'm looking around, I ask...does a deputy live here?
Kid: Yah.
Me: Oops, wrong house. Sorry. PS. My name is Melissa (my partner's name), tell him I stopped by. Giggle as I walk away, knowing I just threw her under the bus and prepare to call Jason (the Sgt. that called me out) to yell at him and ask where the hell he's at.
Me: (calling Jason)..
Jason: Bitch, where are you?
Me: WTF...where are you?
Jason: I told you...2nd stop sign turn right.
Me: Okay, asshole...that's where I went. But you're nowhere around. As a matter of fact, I turned and pulled in where the patrol car is and some kid answered the door.
Jason: LMAO...ooooh, ooops...that's Deputy so & so's house. Go to the 3rd stop sign, not the 2nd one.
Me: UGGGh, ok, I'll be there in 2 seconds.

I need a map book, BAD.

HAPPY 19TH BIRTHDAY MANDY!

2006-06-29T07:51:00.000-06:00

Shower Experience

2006-06-28T06:31:00.000-06:00

So this morning I wake up, get the boys' clothes around and get in the shower. It's taking me longer than usual because my leg hair was 11 inches long, so I decided I would tackle that problem this morning so I could actually swim in that big resin pond in my back yard. Anyway, I get in the shower, do my thing, wash my hair, just get to the point I'm going to rinse it out and out of NOWHERE a big ass Palmetto bug (for those of you from the north these things are HUGE, black and crunch with wings. They're the nastiest things I've ever seen!!) flies down, lands on the bottom of my bathtub and jets toward me at mach 5. Well, this was not a pretty sight as I'm half soapy, trying to jump out of my shower, all the while shrieking! So then I try to open the bathroom door with soapy, wet hands, which doesn't work at all. Chris finally comes to the door, of course the kids are following him, and asks what the problem is. I proceed to show him the "problem" and he rolls his eyes and says, "that's what you were screaming about"? UGGGH...he OBVIOUSLY does not realize the full affect. So, I get back in the shower and all I can think about are the "what if's". What if it would have jumped on my head while I was washing, what if it would have jumped on my face when I washed my face....ugh, I think I need a VERY STRONG liquid breakfast this morning!

Chris & I at the Southernmost Point

2006-06-27T07:34:00.000-06:00

Things that annoy me...

2006-06-09T12:14:00.000-06:00

Uh-oh, this list could get long! Actually I can only think of one thing right now, but that will soon change. Ok, maybe 2.

1. When you dial 411 on your cell phone and it rings FOREVER before someone picks up.
2. When people talk extra loud on their cell phone thinking they actually have to scream for the person on the other end to hear them. (Hey, long transmission, ya know?)
3.
4.
5.

Have you ever noticed?

2006-06-09T12:11:00.000-06:00

Have you ever noticed that I start almost everything out with..."So, I was..."? Even my real-life conversations I start out with "So". Actually, as I read through some of my posts, ok, well most of my posts, I type just like I talk. I didn't notice it until the other day my friend Mystiloo said she was cracking up after reading one of my myspace blogs because she could just hear me saying what I typed.

So, (ha ha) is it a bad thing that I type like I talk?

Update on pool stuff

2006-06-09T06:51:00.000-06:00

So you know now that we had our yard leveled Wednesday--the guy said he would 'try' to have the pool installed Friday or Saturday but most likely it won't happen. He was supposed to tell us either way what was going to happen Wednesday night or Thursday morning, so I could make an alternate arrangement if needed. My alternate arrangement wasn't making me very happy- it was a different pool intstaller that was going to charge me $875 to put the pool up, but at this point it would have worked out much better than leaving 10 boxes of pool in my backyard. So Wednesday night at 8:30 I call the installer to see if anything has changed with the date. No answer. I leave him a message asking him to please call me so we're not left in limbo. I talk to the other installer who tells me he can be out Saturday to install the pool if we want, just to let him know either way Thursday evening. Fine. I go to bed and wake up at 12:30am (yes, just after midnight, you read that correctly) to the phone ringing. Chris asks if I'm on call and I tell him no, though that doesn't matter because I can still get called if we get something "major". He goes to get the phone which has went to voicemail by the time he finds it and sees on the caller ID that it's the POOL INSTALLER! Yep---for whatever reason my wonderful pool installer that has avoided me all day has decided to call at midnight. Now, I hear Chris say it's the pool installer, but it doesn't quite click. I look at the clock, see it's 12:30 and now I'm confused, thinking the power went out and it's actually like 6 or 7 in the morning, because why would my pool installer call at midnight? We wait a few minutes to see if he left a message, nope, no message. Now I'm REALLY, REALLY pissed off and go back to sleep. I wake up at 6:30 Thursday morning and call him. No answer. I don't leave a message (oh--background, this is his cell phone number. The owner of the pool company decided it would just be easier if we call his cell number instead of them, ya know, not their problem, right!?!?!). I call again at 7:30, on my way into the office. This time I can tell he's on the other line because the ring makes a call-waiting type "beep" after each ring. I leave a message telling him that I hope there wasn't an emergency in which he needed us at midnight last night when he called, as I didn't notice a voicemail. I asked him again to call me on my work cell, office line or personal cell once he got the message. I wait. And wait. And wait some more.

Still waiting.

Nothing. Now it's 5:05pm. I've called about 4 more times throughout the day. No answer. Finally I decide to call the pool company, who has already thoroughly pissed me off. I talk to the owner to find out if he has talked to the installer. Yes- he has. In fact, Edwin (the installer) was at their shop all morning installing a DISPLAY pool. Ok, fine, I hang up. WAIT A MINUTE....did he just say Edwin was at their shop all morning setting up a DISPLAY pool? UGGGH. Now, I'm fixin' to go postal. He's probably very lucky that 1. I was in a Sheriff's Office shirt, 2. I was driving an agency vehicle, 3. I was in Inverness, 15 miles away from the pool shop and 4. The pool shop closed at 5 because otherwise he probably would have had to call the Po-Po on me for a very disgruntled customer.
Later that night we go to dinner with Melissa and Rob. I decided after dinner I was going to call the other guy and have him come out to install. I'm sick of the game and at this point I'm not happy about it, but willing to swallow the fact that I have to pay $875 for my pool to be installed. We both try calling Edwin again. I leave a message telling him I'm still waiting for his callback that was supposed to be Wednesday night or Thursday morning, though not at midnight. Chris calls, he leaves a mesage. We drive home. I see we have a message on our home phone from the installation company telling us they will be out tomorrow morning (Friday) to install the pool and they need directions. I call him, give him directions and ask what time he will be there. He says between 7:30 and 8:30am. Well, it's currently 8:50 am and he's not there yet. I give good directions too, damnit. After all, I did work in 911 giving directions all the time. UGGH...can you tell I'm a little aggrivated? SO, at this point I HIGHLY RECCOMEND NOT BUYING A POOL FROM FAMILY POOL, SPA & BILLIARDS. UGGGGG.

Pool Stress

2006-06-07T07:33:00.000-06:00

So we're putting in a new pool. This was a spur of the moment decision, because originally I was going to buy an English Bulldog. But--once I got the price of the Bully and her airline ticket to us I nearly went into cardiac arrest, so we chose the pool instead--for only about 2 grand more than the dog (yes, English Bulldogs are THAT expensive).

We decided on an above ground pool, mainly for the simple fact that we're not going to stay in our house forever and we were not willing to drop 25 grand into it knowing that we may not get that much more out of the house when we sell it. Anyway, the pool we purchased is a 15ft by 30ft oval pool, made of resin, with a lifetime warranty. It's pretty big, so it will probably take up most of my yard and half of my neighbor's. (Just kidding) And, if we do decide to sell we can take the pool with us and the warranty will carry over. Or- if we chose to sink the pool into the ground to make it an "inground" pool, the warranty will still be good. So, I'm pretty excited about it, other than this one little, itsy, bitsy detail. Installation.

We purchased the pool last Tuesday, May 30th. We were supposed to have it installed late that week or sometime this week. By the time the installer called us back, last Friday, the installation was pushed into this week. The installer told us to make sure we have the pool and sand ready Monday. Monday comes around, the only thing we hear from the installer is he will be out Wednesday to level the property. He shows up this morning at 7, levels it and tells us it will be 1-4 days before his crew is back out to install. But--most likely it wouldn't be until next Tuesday or Wednesday. Lemme just tell ya, I'm NOT at all amused because we are leaving for our vacation in the Keys next week. So, basically during the first week we have it we will have to make sure our chemical levels are all accurate because it will be unattended for the week while we are gone, which makes me incredibly nervous. We're going to have someone watching the cats, but these people can't care for our pool. I'm half considering hiring someone for the week to make sure everything stays on track.

I will try to post pictures once everything is set up.

Shopping Misadventure

2006-06-06T11:38:00.000-06:00

I haven't blogged in a little while so before I get the wrath forom some of you for being a slacker I'll post some more useless information.
First- I think I have a serious problem. It's about time I admitted this to myself, since in the past I would just laugh about it. I have a wicked OC streak. (No, not OC, the TV show- Obsessive Compulsive). << See, like right there, I felt compelled to type that as not to confuse my reader. Anyway, I went shopping Friday afternoon, after I got out of work. I had to stay somewhat local because I was on-call, so I just went to Ocala. I specifically went there for 2 things. 1- A new comforter for my bed and 2- to return a pair of pants that I bought that somehow became "too big" in the past week (yay!). Below is a breakdown of my day, because, again, I have OCD and can't do things the easy way.

1. Arrive at the Ocala mall. Dodge lightning bolts going into the store, but thankfully no rain.

2. Walk through Macys, past American Eagle to get to Bath & Body works. There was a new scented lotion there that I wanted to check out "in person" to see if I like it. Buy 3 completely different sets (only because they were on sale).

3. Go into Aeropostale to take back pants. See a different pair, wrong size. Look at everything else, don't see anything I need or want. Refund pants.

4. Walk back in opposite direction to Belk, where I should have parked in the first place. Look at comforters. Phone rings, answer it. Talk on phone and get distracted, heading towards the shoe department. Hang up phone because I can't try on shoes and talk on the phone (priorities). Walk back to the comforters, find King size. Hmmm, I really like the sage/pink one but the linen one is very cute too. Will husband like pink comforter? Do I care? Hmmm. Take pink comforter back to shelf. Find linen one, only to realize I don't like the embroidery along the bottom. Too girlie. Go back to the pink/sage one. Phone rings again. Try to talk on the phone, carry comforter that weighs 59 pounds, through Belk. Get incredibly frustrated because I can't talk (to the same person as before) and shop, hang up phone. Go to register and pay for comforter. Carry 59 pound comforter to other end of the mall where I parked. Put comforter in car and carry on.

5. Go to Ross. Look for sheets for kids' room. Get annoyed because nothing is any order. Walk from Ross to Bed, Bath & Beyond, because I might find a comforter I like more. Accidentally walk into Famous Footwear instead of Bed, Bath & Beyond. See some espidrille shoes I really like at Famous Footwear. Try them on- they feel worse than 3" stilettos. Leave Famous Footwear and go into B, B & B. Remember I want to find a new shower curtain for the main bathroom. Look at placemats, candles, margarita glasses, sheets, comforters (eeek, Belk was cheaper), cutting boards, stainless grill utensils, patio utensils, basically everything BUT shower curtains. Prepare to leave when I realize I forgot to look at shower curtains. Find a shower curtain I like, but don't buy it because I might find another one I like more.

6. Walk back to the car, again dodging lightning, chosing to drive to TJ Maxx instead of walk in case it starts raining.

7. Find some cute shirts at TJ Maxx which reminds me I should go to American Eagle (you know, the store at that mall that I just left, the same mall that I walked around 3 times and MUST have passed American Eagle 3 times). Put the shirts back because I will find one at American Eagle. Look for sheets for boys. Find some, can't decide between solid and print, pick solid.

8. Toss around stopping at Coldstone Creamery (which, btw, I will own a version of someday- LOVE marble slab ice cream), decide not to because it's raining.

9. Drive back to the mall, it's not raining there yet, but I'm not sure why since it's only 1/2 mile away. Park at Macy's. Look for camo tank top. Find a couple, but wait until I go to American Eagle.

10. Go to American Eagle, find the PERFECT shirt. LOVE IT, LOVE IT. Try it on, perfect fit. Now, here's where the OCD really kicks in. Try on a Large. Go back to the stack of shirts, find another Large because I couldn't possibly buy the shrit I just tried on. Find the only other Large they have. See the same shirt in a different color. Decide I want that as well, though I don't like it as much as the first one. Look for one for my stepdaughters. Don't see any that I think they would like. Buy the shirts.

11. Go back to Macy's to look at comforters one more time. Don't find one. Look for swimsuits for the boys, though I just bought 2 new ones from The Children's Place. Find a couple of cute ones...have saleswoman follow me all over the store. I get pissed and go to another register to pay, in the Jr's department. Completely forget about the camo tank top I wanted. Wait in line for ever, it seemed like, until I got frustrated and walked back to the little boy's section. Now, I get THOROUGHLY annoyed because the saleswoman is nowhere to be found--she must have gotten lost following me out of the kid's department. Wait for salesperson. Keep waiting. Put swim trunks back and become EVEN MORE annoyed because I just wasted an hour.

12. Go back to the exit and find the next thing to a hurricane type downpour outside. UGGGH.

I hate shopping.

Please keep my friend Tom in your thoughts & prayers

2006-06-01T17:39:00.000-06:00

Park could see more security
Thursday, June 01, 2006
By Scott Hagenshagen@citpat.com -- 768-4929

The mob beating of a sheriff's deputy could lead police to plan increased patrols at future fireworks shows at Sparks Foundation County Park.
Both the county and city intend to examine law-enforcement staffing levels for fireworks shows and other events in the park because of the incident that sent a deputy to the hospital Saturday night.

"It's important to have visible, adequate staff there," Jackson County Sheriff Dan Heyns said. "It's prevention."
The sheriff's office deployed 10 deputies for the fireworks show; eight city officers were present.
The beating occurred when Deputy Thomas Schuette, 28, lurked into a crowd of about 2,000 people hanging out on Brown Street inside the park for the Weekend in the Park fireworks.
People were fighting in the crowd, and there were reports of women and children being shoved.
Once inside the crowd, a few young men started beating Schuette and stripped him of his baton, handcuffs and chemical irritant. An attempt to remove his pistol was unsuccessful. Schuette suffered spinal and shoulder injuries, as well as abrasions and bruises to his head and face. Additional officers and deputies arrived and the crowd dispersed.
Schuette was treated at Foote Hospital and released Sunday morning. He returned to work Tuesday. A $1,000 reward is being offered for any information that leads to an arrest and conviction of the attackers.

Officials said attendance at the fireworks show, estimated in the thousands, was among the highest ever on a Memorial Day weekend because of the summer-like weather. It rivaled crowds from July 4 fireworks shows.
Earlier in the evening, a staffing problem at the city prevented a full compliment of eight officers from attending the event until later that night. Police officials said it likely did not lead to the assault on the deputy.

"We rectified the situation as the fireworks were ending," Jackson Police Deputy Chief Matt Heins said.

News of the beating stunned some community members, though many said it wouldn't deter them from attending the Fourth of July fireworks show.
"It's sad. I think they sincerely need to look into more security at future events," said Claire Schulcz, who brought her two daughters, aged 8 and 2, to the Memorial Day show. "No matter where you go these days, there's going to be someone doing something stupid."
For some, the attack of a member of law enforcement put society in perspective.
"It makes me angry that people don't have respect for anybody anymore. And instead of talking about it, they act and react and everything is physical," said Doug Babcock, who lives on West Avenue.

"It's sad. To be honest with you, we're trying to sell our house and get out of here."
Kim Conant, director of entertainment at the Cascades, declined to comment. Jackson County Parks Director James Guerriero was not available for comment.

The sheriff's office is currently reconfiguring its mounted division -- absent from the fireworks show last weekend -- and could deploy it for the Fourth of July show, Capt. Kevin Stellingworth said.

"Usually at the fireworks, 99 percent of the people are there to have a good time, to enjoy the show," Heyns said. "The key is having enough personnel there to handle it."

Bible Story

2006-05-24T18:35:00.000-06:00

I'm reading bible stories to the boys, from a children's bible stories book they got at the adoption. One of the beginning chapters touches on Cain & Abel. I read the story, tuck the boys into bed, give hugs and kisses and call it a night. A few minutes later, as I'm trying to sneak a bowl of mint chocolate chip ice cream now that the kids are in bed...

Tyler: Mommy??
Me: Yes Tyler....(waiting for the usual 594 questions once he's in bed routine, including "I'm thirsty, I'm hungry, I have to go to the bathroom", etc...)
Tyler: I just said a prayer.
Me: Good for you!
Tyler: You know what I prayed about?
Me: No, what did you pray about?
Tyler: I prayed for the trees and the flowers and hmmm. Oh yeah, I prayed that I don't kill my brother.

I literally almost choked!

Here's your dang UPDATE

2006-05-24T18:34:00.000-06:00

What is wrong with people???

2006-05-03T08:24:00.000-06:00

New Neighbor

2006-04-30T10:12:00.000-06:00

The house next to mine in the subdivision I live in just became vacant. It's a small ranch style house, very white and clean looking. They've been planting flowers and stuff, preparing to sell it. The homeowner's husband died so she moved elsewhere to be with family and sold the house at a very cheap price (I think she was trying to get rid of it fast) to an investor. The investor is a bit of an asshole. He jacked up the price and ended up selling (I think he sold it) on a lease option. So now I have new neighbors. I haven't really seen much of them since they just moved in this weekend, except for yesterday. They have a chubby little boy, who's actually kinda cute, quiet and reserved. He came over yesterday asking if he could go swimming in our pool. I told him he had to ask his parents. So he came back and said yes. Apparently he goes to the same school as my oldest boy, so they knew each other from passing, but this boy is 8. Tyler will be 7 in November. Anyway, the boy goes swimming and next thing I know his grandfather is walking over. He tells me his name and I introduce myself. In the meantime, the kid is saying "hey, doesn't my grandpa look like Willie Nelson". Grandpa blows it off and says, oh, well my nickname is Willie, so I guess you can call me that. Ok, fine, Willie. I tell Willie that I don't mine his grandson swimming in my pool but he's only allowed in it when my boys are outside or when we're home. He looks at me like I just landed here from Mars. I clarify, telling him that I just don't want any accidents. He then proceeds to yell at the boy, everything I just said. The kid kinda blows him off and continues to swim. Well, the kids get out of the pool and decide they want to go jump on our trampoline. They decide they're going to air dry, which is fine. Grandpa walks his happy ass back over and starts bitching because he brought a towel over and the kid is air drying. I laughed, said it was fine he could leave it because I'm sure they would be back in the pool. He then starts going OFF in German. A good 45 seconds passed as he's on his German rant while my boys just sit there looking at him (like HE just landed from Mars!). His grandson keeps jumping, again blowing him off. I'm thinking to myself, great...I've got some wackadoo living (or at least babysitting) next door to me. I can hardly wait for this experience. Now the kids are still jumping, yelling cannonball. The old man says "fat cannonball, that's right. You're belly's hanging out over your shorts". Now I start getting pissed. I'm fixin to tell this guy to go pound sand because I'm about sick of his big mouth, besides how degrading he was to his 8 year old grandson. Thank God he left, so I didn't have to deal with him anymore. Uggh, I'm seeing this becoming a big problem. Which, leads me to my next point. Working in law enforcement, I have the ability to check backgrounds on those I find suspicious. Guess what I'll be doing Monday morning? I'm going to find out exactly who these people are, why they moved next door to me and who this Willie character is. Look for a full, detailed report next week! ha ha

This Crime Dog guy KILLS me!

2006-04-24T17:38:00.000-06:00

SO I tune into his blog today to see that we both bought new gas grills this weekend. As I read through (his reason for buying a gas grill is about the funniest thing ever- check it out here) his blog I see that the two of us just bought the exact same grill, the exact same weekend at the exact same store and spent the same on it. Well, minus the cover ($24.99) and the mat that goes underneath it so it doesn't get my new deck all yucky ($9.87). $349 later (and a fun, exciting trip to Lowe's) we have a new commercial grade stainless steel gas grill. YAY us. I think Chris just wanted to buy something big so he could use the bed of his pickup truck. (There's just something women like about a pickup man)

So Thursday turned into Sunday

2006-04-23T10:11:00.000-06:00

First, let me start out by saying that summer is definitely here. I was holding out, trying to see how long I could go without turning the air on and mother nature pushed me to my limits late last week when I was attempting to do my hair during a 75 degree morning with 100% humidity. I'm typically a morning person-I can get up, shower and go usually pretty quick, but throw a couple of cranky kids into the picture (from having a hot sleeping night), cranky husband who is not amused at all about having to wear a tie to work (though he does admit it's better than a vest and gun belt) and me trying to deal with everyone--ugh...the air went on. Mucho fast!

We traded our POS Explorer in on a new Chevy Avalanche Thursday. I really like it a lot, other than the color. Yes--white again (rolling my eyes). White is ok, but definitely wasn't my first choice. We know the owner of the car dealership and that's what he had on hand and gave us an AWESOME deal, so white it is. Chris and I really wanted an F150, but I think we got more truck for our $ with this one. Actually, Chris REALLY wanted an F250, but that wasn't really in the budget (thankfully because I think they look like farm trucks).

Redneck Yacht Club party on the water last Tuesday went well. We all got a little sun but had mucho fun. This has turned into a yearly tradition for the past four years, mainly in celebration of Chris' birthday. Oh, he turned 40 a couple of weeks ago!!!!!!!!! Hmmpft, I should say much though because 30 is right around the corner.

Ok--well I'll blog more later, must go do some yard work.

xo

Breaking News

2006-04-19T18:15:00.000-06:00

I just wanted to let my loyal readers know that I will be updating Thursday sometime!

xo

KP

Crazy Week

2006-03-28T08:00:00.000-07:00

Ok, so I haven't really updated like I've been wanting to (or telling myself to) but it's just been such a crazy past few days.

First, someone from my past (like waaaay past, 10+ years ago) and I came in contact, through email. It was the craziest thing ever, not only because I wasn't expecting it, but well, because I wasn't expecting it. Considering the circumstances, a pleasant conversation took place, just awkward. After explaining this situation to a very good friend of mine, getting a "guys" point of view, he told me to steer clear of the situation at all costs. After filling in most of the details and giving him a brief history, he told me his take on it. Basically it goes something like this... You're a recovering alcoholic. You been sober now for at least 8 years and though the road to recovery hasn't been an easy one all the time, it's been worth it. Look how far you've come! When you go home, look around you. Did you see any of that 10 years ago? If you did, that dream you had became reality! Kel, all it takes is that one drink for you to relapse. That one drink will bring to the surface so many different feelings and emotions, some good, some bad. Do you really think your body can handle that? Think about it.

I thought about it. I gave in and took that drink, so to speak. That drink of course sparked some curiousity, which led me to take another. I think I'm able to break away from that poison again, answering a couple of questions, but not coming out ahead nor behind.

In a way, I'm glad I answered that email. My friend's advice was good and I will take it into consideration. Oh, just for the record, this isn't anything illegal, immoral or irresponsible. It's just strickly an email. (I know how our minds like to wander sometimes!)

The craziest thing just happened

2006-03-22T08:47:00.000-07:00

I was talking to my friend Samantha (who just happens to work at a local bank that is about 1 mile away) on the phone when all of the sudden I see two of our undercover detectives run out of the building to the parking lot. Well, considering the fact that these detectives rarely do anything that constitutes as "work" (IMHO), it was quite a shock to see them running and not even chasing anyone or being chased. As I give Samantha the play by play, I look at our dispatch screen to see exactly what was going on, when I see there is a call that was just dispatched for a "Robbery/Holdup". As I'm looking at the address, the location is becoming much more familiar. Then I see the bank it came from...the same bank that Samantha works at. Now, why I do this I'm not sure, but I lower my voice (like the bad guy could possibly be in my office or something) and tell her the screen is showing that her bank is in the process of being robbed. She says "WHAT"!? I reitereated that she can't say anything and continue to tell her the detaisl. She then tells me that there's nobody even in the bank, so how could they be getting robbed? At that point I had no idea, maybe it was a robbery to a person outside or at the ATM, but half of our major crimes section is heading out the door, so I tell her I'm on my way (because where there's a crime, there's a victim). I get there, see what an awesome job everyone has done of blocking off the intersections and start pulling people aside and pretty soon find out that it is across the street, not actually at the bank. Apparently someone who has an office at the upstairs of the bank saw two people across the street, one apparently having some type of gun in his hand point it at the other's head. Well, it actually turned out to be two kids playing laser tag, enjoying the nice spring day in their back yard.

Nice adrenaline rush for the day!

I promised not to laugh...out loud

2006-03-17T18:33:00.000-07:00

Conversation between me and my friend Mickey:

Mickey: I'm going to tell you something funny, only if you promise not to laugh at me...because I'm not in the mood to be laughed at.

Me: Ok...I promise

Mickey: I just picked up my personal cell and attempted to call you...but instead I accidentally called my work phone.

Me: Okay????!!!!!

Mickey: But, I didn't realize it was me calling my work phone, so I picked it up and answered it...then I heard myself echo in my ear. It wasn't funny.

Me: Trying everything I can not to start hysterically laughing out loud....NIIIIICE! I know, I promised not to laugh....gotta go now....click. HA HA HA HA HA (out loud).

This was probably funnier having him tell it, but I got a chuckle!

Why I love St. Patty's Day

2006-03-17T17:18:00.000-07:00

Nope, it's not green beer or corned beef & cabbage. It's McDonald's Shamrock Shakes. YUMM!

I stole this idea from Crime Dog

2006-03-10T08:12:00.000-07:00

The Music Game!
You have to pick an artist, and answer the following questions using only that artist's song titles. Crime Dog picked Buffett, but I'm going to also--just changing the answers around a little bit!

1. Name of band/artist: Jimmy Buffett
2. Are you male or female?: Girl Gone Crazy on Caroline St.
3. Describe yourself: Makin' Music for Money
4. How do you feel about yourself?: The Weather is Here, Wish You Were Beautiful
5. Describe your ex girlfriend/boyfriend: Incommunicado or WDWGDAS
6. Describe current girlfriend/boyfriend: Perfect Partner or Frank and Lola
7. Describe where you want to be: Lovely Cruise
8. Describe how you live: Growing Older but not Up
9. Describe how you love: Happily Ever After
10. What would you ask for if you had just one wish?: If I Had A Million Dollars (oh wait...that's not Buffett...) Diamond as Big as the Ritz
11. Share a few words of Wisdom: (with a little) Love and Luck (you will get by)
12. Now say goodbye: Changing Channels

A year ago today

2006-03-05T19:03:00.000-07:00

A year ago today my mom was diagnosed with Lung Cancer. I never blogged about this before, but not really for any particular reason. She's in remission now, and has been for about 8 months. She was diagnosed while here in Florida and did most of her treatments and chemo here, finishing up in Michigan.

It will never cease to amaze me why people who smoke continue to do it, knowing the heath risks involved. I understand that it's an incredibly hard habit to break, not only because of addiction, but also because it's simply that...a habit. I rank smoking right up there along the same lines as suicide. I hate it. Suicide might be great for the person contemplating it, but it destroys everyone and everything around them. Smoking does the exact same thing, only on a different level. Suicide is usually quick, often times painless for victim (if that's what you choose to call it), but also for their loved ones and friends. Smoking is lifelong. Everyone knows how dangerous it is. Family, friends and loved ones are faced to watch the smoker's suicide. Every day, day after day, year after year. Until finally, that day comes. That day could be a life sentence of cancer or worse. A life sentence of death. Mostly both.

Ok, because I'm starting to get frustrated and incredibly annoyed I'm going to stop blogging about this for now. Maybe later I'll continue.

Oh--for the record, I'm not comparing smoking to drinking or other drugs for justification purposes. I know they're all equally dangerous.

So there is hope?

2006-03-03T08:13:00.000-07:00

Household Havoc
By PsychologyToday

In June of 1982 I gave birth to my first son, Chris. At the time I thought I had all the patience, knowledge and expertise necessary for raising a child. After all, I had worked in an intensive care unit, emergency room and as head nurse of a Mental Health Clinic. I was also the oldest sister of eight siblings.

I couldn't have been more wrong.

I was not even remotely prepared for what I was about to face as a mother. My dream of a little house with a white picket fence was quickly replaced with an emotional roller coaster. My son, though intelligent and articulate, was also very easily distracted and incapable of sitting still and staying on task. No matter what I asked him to do, his answer was a defiant, “No.” He was verbally aggressive and yelled at me routinely. During his fits of rage, everything but the kitchen sink came out of his mouth. And every time, it felt like someone was putting a knife in my heart.

Until Chris was 8 years old, I fought to understand why motherhood was so different for me compared with other women. Then he was diagnosed with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) along with Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD), which co-occurs in about 40 percent of those diagnosed with ADHD. But my story is not about ADHD. It's about learning to cope with the emotions I faced firsthand during both the years before Chris was diagnosed and those following while raising a child with special needs.

Chris and I weren't the only ones having a hard time communicating. The constant stress also took a toll on my relationship with my husband and my younger son. I yelled a lot, my husband was certain I was being an inappropriate mother, and Chris was confused about the level of respect between his mother and father. We were a family falling apart.

Thankfully, things started to change when Chris began receiving appropriate treatment. With help from professionals, I was finally able to let go of the blame and judgment I felt from others. Then I sought out other parents who were experiencing similar issues. My husband and I began attending regular educational forums and conferences, soaking up support and knowledge to design an effective plan of action for Chris' treatment.

We went through every type of treatment possible; when one intervention didn't work, we tried another. Adderall, a psycho-stimulant, increased Chris' ability to concentrate and calmed his defiance, but medication is a short-term solution to a 24-hour-a-day problem. Behavior modification charts were extremely useful. I combined them with positive reinforcement to enforce agreed-upon rules, and each chart was age-specific and used until the desired behaviors had become automatic.

Today, Chris is in his twenties, and his condition will likely be a lifelong struggle for him. But he is learning to accommodate his needs and I have learned to pick my battles wisely.
Recently, I had the opportunity to speak at a workshop sponsored by the Center for the Advancement of Child and Adolescent Mental Health on this very topic. It reminded me of the importance of parental networking, and that early intervention is key in both taking control of the disorder and alleviating family stress. I hope my story will help others who feel alone in confronting ADHD. And I'm looking forward to a loving future with my own family, and to enjoying our lives together.

New brother in law (sorda...)

2006-02-26T18:06:00.000-07:00

This is me and Rick Razzano, fullback with the TB Bucs. He rode along with Chris the other night and loved him so much that everyone calls him Chris' little brother. Rick played high school football in Ohio, college ball in Mississippi and was drafted by the Bucs as Mike Alstott's backup and ultimately his replacement. He is married to Leah and has a little baby girl. This is truely one of the nicest guys I've met!

Bad Mom?

2006-02-23T07:39:00.000-07:00

Conversation between me, my 4 year old (Austin) and my 6 year old (Tyler):

Austin: Mommy, did you know something bad happened to Abraham Lincoln?
Me: No, what happened?
Austin: (with the most sincere look of seriousness and huge eyes) He got SHOT!
Me: Oh my gosh! How did you know that?
Austin: My teacher told me.
Tyler: Is he dead?
Austin: Mmm hmmm!
Tyler: So is George Washington DC!

I had to laugh. Out loud. Am I a bad mom for not correcting him?

Today is HB's HB!

2006-02-22T07:11:00.000-07:00

Happy 30th Birthday Holly!

xo

Those Crazy Spartans!!!

2006-02-15T13:28:00.000-07:00

Students from Michigan State University take the Polar Plunge at a park in Lansing. The students helped raise money for Special Olympics by taking a leap into the frigid 34 degree water!

Country Christmas

2006-02-12T10:09:00.000-07:00

This was taken at our agency Christmas party. The theme this year was A Country Christmas. John Deere is country, right??? (Jody, Kelly, Melissa & ME!)

Florida Keys

2006-02-09T10:52:00.000-07:00

The countdown is officially on. We leave for our vacation on June 16th, spending a week at a house we rented in the keys. I can't wait! It will be a much deserved vacation. Chris and I went on a cruise last May which was an AWESOME vacation, but it was only for a long weekend. This time we are renting a house with Rob & Melissa, on the grounds of the Cheeca Resort in Islamorada and are preparing to bask in the sunshine. From what we read and hear there is so much to do at the resort for all ages. They have day camps for the boys, including fishing, crabbing, sand castles, swimming and all kinds of exploring. They also have fun nights for the little ones, including Pizza, movies, crafts, etc... The teens and us adults will have spa privelages, free use of the kayaks and bicycles and also included are the tennis facilities, 9 hole par 3 golf course and hot tubs. The two pools sit aside a sandy crystal clear beach. (I feel like I'm promoting a commercial!!! ha ha) As an added bonus there are many watersports marinas in the area and Islamorada is the sport fishing capitol of the world, so not only can they go out on big deep sea excusions, the guys can fish off the dock! If I can make it past the Relay for Life Golf Tournament and Relay walk, Chris' Alsaka trip and my 30th birthday I'll be all set!

New Look

2006-02-03T19:13:00.000-07:00

I'm trying something new with my blog, mainly out of boredom. Now don't get concerned when you read the "estranged love" blogskin, I just liked the lotus picture. Let me know if it become an annoyance to scroll from left to right--I'm not sure how to adjust the size just yet.

Carry on...

Funny

2006-01-28T06:57:00.000-07:00

I'm not creative enough to have thought of this one on my own, but my friend Crime Dog is!

Q: What do you get when you cross an insomniac, a dyslexic, and an agnostic?
A: A guy who lies awake at night wondering if there really is a Dog.

I laughed. A lot.

Slowing down a bit

2006-01-24T07:06:00.000-07:00

I've got a lot to do and a little time to do it, so for now I will be taking a small hiatus from blogging. Not that I upated all that often anyway, but probably even less now.

I'm in the middle of planning a Golf Tournament for the American Cancer Society's Relay for Life. Our Sheriff's Office sponsors a team every year, with the exception of last year, due to the Lunsford case. I'm going to try to devote most of my extra time to this, in hopes that we have an awesome turn out and can help surpass the $270,000 raised by Citrus County last year.

If you have anything to contribute or would like to golf, please contact me at kprus@sheriffcitrus.org. We're accepting donations for the raffle, as well as hole sponsorships, for a $100 donation. Golfers pay only $50 to play, including beer, lunch and prizes!

Hanging out with Mickey, Minnie & Goofy!

2006-01-18T08:19:00.000-07:00

Click this link to read the article on our Sheriff's Office employees running the Half Marathon, Marathon and for some, both!

So true...

2006-01-17T12:11:00.000-07:00

Worth the read from Crime Dog's blog!

Gardening

2006-01-17T06:49:00.000-07:00

I've been wanting to do this for a while but never really had the guts, or energy to do it. I'm not such a good gardner, never have been. In my life garden, there are usually a couple of really big, beautiful flowers that come back year after year. Some new flowers come in and make a good border, but generally speaking there are a lot of dandelions and weeds. That's really my own fault, for not weeding and fertilizing as much as I should. After careful consideration, I've decided to start pulling the weeds.

These weeds come and they mulitply. Eventually, what ends up happening is these weeds try to take over. The gardner knows these pesky weeds will do this but unfortunately is too busy, lazy, tired, whatever the excuse may be, to take care of the problem. The gardner hears it from other gardners how she needs to control her weed problem, but ignores the problem instead of dealing with it. Now, like I said. occassionally there are a couple of dandelions. The dandelions are still considered weeds, but arean't as easy to see through. They come off as pretty, bright yellow flowers, trying to fit in...but in reality they're not only lying to the gardner, but also to themselves.

As a gardner, I don't like being lied to. In fact, I despise it. I've got enough in my greenhouse without having to be lied to about stupid things. What's actually quite humorous is this gardner is no stranger to being lied to, by weeds and dandelions. This garnder knows a lie, and though it may not seem obvious, she stores it in her gardening glove for later use. She probably shouldn't do that. She really should just pull the weed immediately, but instead she resorts to her old ways. You see, the difference between a weed and a dandelion is the weed lies, knowing they will get caught in that lie but doesn't really care (I was a weed once). Then, the lies keep spreading and spreading until they become out of control (I am now a terrible liar and tend to get caught if I even THINK about lying!). A dandelion, on the other hand, will lie to you but think you don't know the truth, when in all actuality, this gardening community is very small and the truth comes around much, much quicker than they think. You see, other gardners talk, gardners they think would never tell anyone else their gardening secrets. But they do.

So...I have officially started weeding my garden. If you are reading this and I studdenly stop talking to you for no apparent reason, consider yourself weeded! (Just kidding...sorda)

Blonde Moment

2006-01-11T13:34:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I was wearing capri type pants with nylons and dress shoes. Well I just happened to look down and in my nylons was a piece of lint/string that obviously stuck to the inside of them from the washer and I didn't notice it.

Me: Oh nice, I have a string in my nylons (pointing to the back of my calf).
Melissa: Oh yeah, I saw that earlier. Meant to tell ya about it.
Me: So you let me walk around with this all day? Hmmpft. Well, I hope nobody walks in (we have a somewhat private office area) because I'm going to just stick my hand down my nylons (from the waist area) and get it out.
Melissa: Well, aren't you wearing knee highs?
Me: Yeah?
Melissa...silence
Me: Oh shoot, LOL, nevermind I'll just pull it off!!!!

Even the best of us have blonde moments at times!

Junkie...

2006-01-09T17:12:00.000-07:00

Ok, this next post is dedicated to my friend hmb. During the past several months I have read about this Tai Chi, or Chai Tea, or some crazy drink she relishes. I have always been a little leary of trying things from coffee bars, mainly because I don't drink coffee. Fear of the unknown, I guess. A few weeks ago I went to our local breakfast joint, Cinnamon Sticks, for a bite to eat. They've done some extensive remodeling and added a cappucino bar. I took a leap into the unknown and tried a sample of Tazo Chai Tea. It was, well..."ok" would be pushing it. You see, I have this issue with milk. Especially warm milk. And being that this is a latte drink it obviously has warm milk in it. You see where I'm going with this, right? Great. So, we go to Orlando for the marathon this past weekend and low and behold there's a Starbucks in the lobby. The crowd goes wild! Well...maybe not. But after the race I offered to buy a coffee for everyone. Some went with cappucino's, some with mocha, some with espresso. Me...after a short non-english speaking (hense, short) conversation with the employee at Starbucks I take that once familiar leap into the unknown. I try a Tazo Chai Tea Latte. HO-LEE-COW that's some good stuff. I was instantly addicted. After 3 more that day and one the following morning I decide I need to learn how to make this stuff. Which brings me to my question----should I wait until my tax return (hoping that I actually receive a return this year) and buy a cappucino machine or should I (((shudder))) make the 'latte' myself, using the conventional stove recipe? Your suggestions would be appreciated!

All things about me...

2006-01-08T16:57:00.000-07:00

I'm partially watching Miami Ink. It's making me want another tattoo, bad...but I'm not exactly sure what I would get. I'm thinking something like a Celtic knot. Something that represents eternity, love and being a goddess. All things about me! (just kidding)

Can you believe another year has passed? I didn't fulfill my new year's resolution, of course. I take a ride on the train of success then it derails. Go figure. I'll have to work on that. I would like to run in the Gasparilla 5k in Tampa. After seeing the Disney Marathon I've kinda got the runner's bug, which brings me to my next topic.

The marathon weekend was GREAT! I checked into the hotel early on Friday after attending a Civil Justice class in Orlando. As I waited for Chris, Gater, Mac, Angel, Juan, Ritli, John and Mickey to come I went shopping at the outlets. I didn't really intend to buy anything until I found a two pairs of jeans, a pair of khakis, a sweatshirt, sweater and shorts all for under $50! I LOVE to bargain shop! We stayed at the Embassy Suites Lake Buena Vista. I will DEFINITELY stay there again. They had happy hour for 2 hours during the evening with basic call drinks, beer, wine and their "special" drink of the evening. One night it was kahlua, amaretto and cream. I'm not into any of those liquors but it did sound pretty good. They also had snacks, like popcorn and pretzels during happy hour. I was pleasantly surprised. Anyway, back to the marathon (get all carried away when I start discussing free snacks and drinks! ha ha). Saturday morning the guys, as well as several others from our agency all met at 4:45 to go to the Disney property for the 6:00 marathon start. Angel and I went down there around 8:00 to watch them finish. HOLY COW....there were a lot of runners! We eventually met up with our group, but missed most of the cross the finish line, mainly due to the amount of people down there. After seeing all of that I think with the right gradual training I can participate in next year's Disney Half Marathon. Check back in a year to see if I complete it!

2006-01-05T12:39:00.000-07:00

As we walk out of Stumpknockers we see a cute little white fluffy puppy being walked by it's owner.

Kelly: Aww, look at that little white dog
Patrol Captain: Oh, that's Snowball...c'mere Snowball
(keeps calling Snowball to try to come to him)
Me: You know that dog?
Patrol Captain: No!

2005-12-31T07:01:00.000-07:00

Just had to remind myself of why I dislike Mickey so much...

Oh--happy new year's eve!

2005-12-25T15:43:00.000-07:00

Merry Christmas Everyone!

2005-12-14T19:35:00.001-07:00

I'm practing learning html tags--going to try something.

©

Cool, it worked!

Random Thoughts...

2005-12-13T18:06:00.000-07:00

It's 8:11pm.
I'm sitting at work right now, after going to the gym.
I have a headache.
I really need to start baking 3 dozen cookies for our cookie exchange at work.
I'm very glad, for various reasons, that my Nextel doesn't have a signal right now.
I think I'm kinda hungry but don't really feel like eating.
I wish I could go to the gym for like 5 more hours and see results now.
NOW!

But I can't.

...

One Word...

2005-12-01T19:30:00.000-07:00

So I sent out an email earlier today that went something to the effect of this: Reply to me with one word that best describes me. Of the 7 people I got that email back from, 3 were genuinely nice comments. The other had something to do with me being bitchy on a regular basis. I resemble that comment, which brings me to the perfect Christmas present. You will find it at Abercrombie in the clearance section. I need a size Large.

Black Friday Part I

2005-11-27T09:24:00.000-07:00

I admit, I'm a Black Friday junkie. I have been, well, I guess as long as I've been married and maybe even before that. It puts me in the holiday spirit and gives me this certain rush. Especially when you find something in the sale ads you really want or need and see that it's going to be a great deal on Black Friday. It's kinda like when Buffett tickets go onsale. You know you want them, the better the seats, the bigger the task--but just getting 'in' is half the battle.

Two years ago it was trampolines that were one of the big sellers at Wal Mart. My mom called me about two weeks before Thanksgiving to tell me she was getting the kids a trampoline for Christmas and when I saw they were going to sell for some outrageously cheap price on Black Friday I made her return her's, send me the $ and I would buy it much, much cheaper---plus accomplish something for myself. I would succomb to the mental and physical battle that Black Friday entails! I got to Wal Mart at 4:30, they opened at 5. I was about 5th in line for the trampolines....whew, I made it. (I'd hate to have to tell my mom to go back to the store and get the trampoline all over again because I didn't make it in time to get a bargain trampoline!) But--the news started spreading like wildfire...there were only 9 trampolines at that store! I was about 5th in line, but one person wanted two...so I would still be guaranteed a trampoline, I hoped. By myself I stood in line...waiting. Watching my cell phone (to see what time it was), waiting...waiting. Several people started getting in line for the trampolines about 4:50am when the first lady in line (who had been there since 2am) told those people the trampolines at that time were all accounted for. I guess she didn't believe her, the woman continued in line. We saw the trampolines on a big pallet in front of us. The store employee (about 70 years old I think) started taking the tarps off the boxes and began lifting them up on end to have the barcode. People started rushing in to get their trampoline...5 minutes left. Finally, time to ring them up. The poor old man tried lifting those trampolines up into the shopping carts, which was nearly and impossible task by himself, considering those oblong boxes weighed at least 200 pounds.

I started to wonder what I was going to do, there was no way I was going to lift that box up by myself and put it in a 4' x 2' metal basket on wheels. Luckily, the old man helped me, with the help of another man. I held the cart so it wouldn't move. Whew, in the cart in went and I took off. It was like an episode of the game show Shop til' You Drop! I took off, full speed ahead--which was actually turtle's pace considering the weight of my cart, the 4 foot of weapon hanging off the front and the mobs of people. I paid for my gem and headed to the parking lot.

Oh no...the parking lot. It's still dark outside! Where did all these people come from? Oh shoot....where did I park? I wander aimlessly looking for my vehicle when finally I find it. I open the back of the Explorer and start to think. OH SHOOT! How in the HELL am I going to get this 200lb, 7 foot long box in the back of my truck all by myself? I look around and see nobody that is in any shape (or mood) to help. I prop my cart against the back bumper of the truck, place my right foot in front of the left front wheel and start to tug on the plastic cord that is wrapped around the box. UGGGH, UGGGH, UGGGH. Hmmmpft. How in the HELL am I going to get this in, I repeat to myself. Finally, I figure if I can lift up the cart by the handle and dump the box in the back, the box will fall on the back of the back seats that are laying down and I'll just pull the cart out real fast. Yeah, that's what I'll do. Just about the time I'm getting ready to do the big dump a truck drives by me very slowly. I look and see a woman in the passenger seat that I recognize...then I see the driver, Bobby, a deputy that works with us.

Oh, Bobby! You're a lifesaver I yelled! He asked me if I needed help (as if it weren't obvious) and lifted the box into the truck for me.

Several bruises, a hurt back and about an hour later I arrived home, safe, unharmed and trampoline in tow. I gave myself a pat on the back and a good job high five for another year tackled of Black Friday mayhem, and went back to bed!

2005-11-26T15:15:00.000-07:00

This was an interesting group....Chris from St. Pete, Dave, Chris & Matt O-D

2005-11-26T15:05:00.000-07:00

Dave, Me & John

2005-11-26T15:02:00.000-07:00

The margaritas made Melissa hungry on Thanksgiving Day...

32 Days Until Christmas...

2005-11-23T12:52:00.000-07:00

A Christmas Story

'Twas the night before Christmas--
Old Santa was pissed.
He cussed out the elves and threw down his list.
Miserable little brats, ungrateful little jerks.
I have a good mind to scrap the whole works!

I've busted my ass for damn near a year,
Instead of "Thanks Santa"--what do I hear?
The old lady bitches cause I work late at night.
The elves want more money--
The reindeer all fight.

Rudolph got drunk and goosed all the maids.
Donner is pregnant and Vixen has AIDS.
And just when I thought that things would get better
Those assholes from the IRS sent me a letter,
They say I owe taxes--if that ain't damn funny
Who the hell ever sent Santa Claus any money?

And the kids these days--they all are the pits
They want the impossible--
Those mean little shits
I spent a whole year making wagons and sleds
Assembling dolls...Their arms, legs and heads
I made a ton of yo yo's--No request for them,
They want computers and robots...they think - I'm IBM!

Flying through the air...dodging the trees
Falling down chimneys and skinning my knees
I'm quitting this job there's just no enjoyment
I'll sit on my fat ass and draw unemployment.

There's no Christmas this year now you know the reason,
I found me a blonde.
I'm going SOUTH for the season

2005-11-23T12:49:00.000-07:00

To my loyal readers and lurkers (I know you're out there!!)-

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!

xo Kelly

2005-11-21T16:58:00.000-07:00

My sinus infection cleared up---now it's just allergies!

Blood, Guts and Gore (well, almost)

2005-11-14T17:58:00.000-07:00

Having a sinus infection sucks. What's really bad is I get one almost every other month, on average. I don't smoke--nobody in my house does--and I don't have mold at home, so it must be contributed to allergies. I could blame it on my office, because it tends to have a dampness sometimes, but I did work at the Emergency Operations Center for over two years, which is very comparible to a bunker (imagine that in the Florida humidisticky) and had the same problem there as well. My doctor hints around that maybe I should consult my ENT for sinus surgery but I'm not all about that. Imagine having your nose poked and prodded at, peeled apart, put back together then having a tampon shoved up into your sinues for a couple days. Now---imagine them taking it out---yep, after clotting and starting the healing process (yep, scabbing and all) pulling that sucker out. From what I hear it feels like your eyeballs, ears, maxible and everything else should be coming out with it. In other words, it's not a pleasant experience. (Oh--your welcome for all of you with weak stomachs, not wanting the gory details--hmb) So, for now I'll just complain about it on my blog and gross everakj;djk (oops, my fingers slid off the keys from snot dripping all over) everyone out by talking about it.

xoxo

8th Grade Math??? EEEK!

2005-11-02T13:43:00.000-07:00

You Passed 8th Grade Math

Congratulations, you got 8/10 correct!

Could You Pass 8th Grade Math?

2005-10-30T18:56:00.000-07:00

Tampa Bay Devil Rays Pitcher Seth McClung and me--chin up this time.

2005-10-30T18:49:00.000-07:00

The group--just before we said goodbye. Back: Jason; Middle: Mike, Lynn, Gary, Chris, Brian and Dave. Front: "Diamond" Dave Santos (former pro. boxer).

2005-10-30T18:47:00.000-07:00

Dave Williams, another not so cute picture of me and Jason. Jason took this picture---I guess none of the other 15 people with us were sober enough to snap photos. ??

2005-10-30T18:45:00.000-07:00

Mike, Jason (from St. Pete PD) and Brian. In the background is "Tank".

2005-10-30T18:40:00.000-07:00

From left to right: Mike Alstott, Gary, Mike from Mississippi, Chris, Dave Moore and a St. Pete city council woman.

2005-10-30T18:37:00.000-07:00

Yeah, he's sorda cute. Yeah, I have 2 chins in that picture. Actually, as Chris was taking the pictures I was commenting on how gay it was that I was making him pose in a picture with me!

Wing House Fundraiser

2005-10-30T09:32:00.000-07:00

A while back Chris introduced me to a PR Liason for the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, Mr. David Williams. What a nice guy! Dave is in his mid 40's I'm guessing and has an incredible amount of enthusiasm and love for law enforcement. It's rare, I know. Anyway, Dave comes up to our agency occassionally with some current and some retired sports stars, including football players, boxers, wrestlers and baseball players, allowing them the opportunity to ride along with our deputies. Basically, summed up that's how Chris met Dave.

Anyway, when Hurricane Katrina struck somehow Dave got in touch with a police department in Mississippi that was in need. Now, when I say in need I truely mean IN NEED! When Hurricane Katrina made her landfall just east of New Orleans the majority forgot about every city affected but New Orleans. Seriously--that's pretty much all you saw on the news was New Orleans this, New Orleans that...but what about the cities to the east and west of New Orleans? Dave got in touch with the police chief of the Long Beach Police Department in Mississippi and told him he had some connections and would like to help. I can imagine how the conversation went...as if this police chief didn't have enough on his plate let alone some yahoo from Florida calling and offering help. It didn't quite work that way though.

Dave would soon learn much more than most of us can imagine. Of their nearly 50 man (and woman) force, almost ALL of them lost EVERYTHING! They lost the building that once housed their police department and most of their patrol cars, not to mention homes, businesses, personal mementos that just can't be replaced.

Picture this: You know a hurricane is coming but you work for a police agency. It's your job to serve and protect, right? So...does that mean you go to your home, pack up in a U-haul and head north, abandoning your post? Since you live in a coastal community you know that there's a good chance of some destruction, you just don't know how much. You board up, pack up, lock up and leave. You send your wife and children to friends and relatives north of you. Waaaay north of you. You go to work---arriving on duty at 5:00 am and you don't go home until 3:00 the next morning. You hear reports of water coming inland several miles, you power lines snapping in half all over the place and debris flying everywhere. You secure yourself the best you can at the police headquarters when suddenly the roof starts to leak. Then, you hear the shingles blowing off. Eventually, you hear firsthand what the townfolk told stories about every hurricane season. The roaring sound resembling a freight train coming through. Soon the roof literally flies off the building you have secured yourself in. As water and debris pour in you make your way to other parts of the building, such as the evidence locker, in hopes that you can safely make your way to the football stadium across the street for hopefully more shelter. You know it's too late and hunker down saying your prayers, hoping that when the winds settle you'll see the sun come up tomorrow. You are able to return to your home after working nearly 24 hours. You find nothing. Literally. Nothing. What once was your home you shared with family is now a cement foundation. What once was your parent's 7th story condominium is now a pile of 2x4's on the ground. What once was your local Walmart is a building with no roof. There is nothing left inside. You ask yourself, where did it all go? Walmart sells more than just clothes and movies, they sell heavy things like trampolines, tv's, stereo systems. We had no looting, where did it all go? Nothing left inside...it must be somewhere out there...somewhere. Same thing with K-mart and the grocery stores. Same thing all over. Your port is a major supplier for chicken all across the world. There are 55,000 pounds of chicken sitting in warehouses--or what once was a warehouse, rotting in the hot Mississippi sunshine. There is a warehouse full of fresh fruit that was to be shipped out...all gone--rotten. Then the unthinkable...the morgues...full of bodies but no power supply. I'm sure you can imagine the rest...

That is what the guys and gals of the Long Beach Police Department dealt with, aside dealing with their own family issues. And that's really just the tip of the iceberg. Dave Williams worked with the police chief and was able to send the 2 officers who were hardest hit and most affected by the storm. Mike and Brian arrived in Citrus County to meet our agency personnel Thursday. What nice guys! Just two regular guys, both with familes, displaced by such a huge disaster.

Friday, Dave Williams coordinated a fundraiser at the Wing House in St Pete. The Wing House charged $10 per person for a platter of chicken, pasta salad, fries and a soft drink. ALL of the money raised was to go directly to Mike and Brian and their police department. Dave was also able to speak with the Rooms to Go V.P. and secure a very large donation for this police department and their families. When I say large, I mean to the effect of 9 digits. Each officer was going to get a minimum of $10,000 worth of furniture for their homes, when they get homes. Most are currently living in FEMA motorhomes or campers...not trailers, campers.

Besides many local law enforcement agencies being represented, Dave brought in Tampa Bay Buccanneers Fullback Mike Alstott and Dave Moore. The Tampa Bay Storm head coach was present. The starting pitcher for the Tampa Bay Devil Rays, Seth McClung, showed up as well. Remember the American Gladiators show? It used to be on TV on Sunday afternoons when I lived in Michigan. Anyway, one of the Gladiators, The Tank, appeared. A few WWF wrestlers were present as well as Matt O'Dwyer from the Green Bay Packers and several other celebs. They had a silent auction, a live auction and a raffle. In cash that night over $5,000 was raised. The Wing House matched that amount, sending the LBPD guys home with over $10,000 cash to distribute. What a wonderful night!

Mike and Brian both said they were a little embarrassed, in their words all they did was show up to work. But in reality, they did much more by being present and making their reality hit home for all of us. Mike and Brian, I doubt you will ever see this blog (my first clue is probably because I didn't give you the blog link before I left) but just so you know you guys are great and welcome in Citrus County anytime!

PS. They were also put up in a room at the Renaissance Vinoy in St. Pete---1 word--POSH.

Adore

2005-10-24T17:02:00.000-06:00

Austin singing: "Heavenly father, I adore you...(inaudible),
Heavenly father, I adore you...(inaudible)..."

Chris: Austin, what does adore me?

Austin: It means love.

Family Conversation...

2005-10-24T16:56:00.000-06:00

Me: (talking to Chris) So do you want to go to lunch tomorrow or are you going to be home for dinner?

Chris: (preparing to leave for a SWAT school for a few days) Well that depends, I have to take a test at the college at noon tomorrow, so it'll have to be way before that.

Me: Well, I was thinking if you came home I would fix some gourmet dinner.

Tyler: Mommy, you don't know how to cook.

Chris: (laughing quietly to himself)

Me: Yes I do! I cook things all the time and you like them!

Tyler: No I don't...you just put cologne on it and that makes it taste good.

LOL!! Kids are funny.

My Full Name (Maiden)

2005-10-21T11:14:00.000-06:00

Name Calculator

You entered: (Full Maiden Name)

There are 16 letters in your name.
Those 16 letters total to 77.
There are 5 vowels and 11 consonants in your name.

Your number is: 5
The characteristics of #5 are: Expansiveness, visionary, adventure, the constructive use of freedom.
The expression or destiny for #5: The number 5 Expression endows with the wonderful characteristic of multi-talents and versatility. You can do so many things well. The tone of the number 5 is constructive freedom, and in your drive to attain this freedom, you will likely be the master of adaptability and change. You are good at presenting ideas and knowing how to approach people to get what you want. Naturally, this gives you an edge in any sort of selling game and spells easy success when it comes to working with people in most jobs. Your popularity may lead you toward some form of entertainment or amusement. Whatever you do, you are clever, analytical, and a very quick thinker.
If there is too much of the 5 energy in your makeup, you may express some the negative attitudes of the number. Your restless and impatient attitude may keep you from staying with any project for too long. Sometimes you can be rather erratic and scatter yourself and your energies. You have a hard time keeping regular office hours and maintaining any sort of a routine. You tend to react strongly if you sense that your freedom of speech or action is being impaired or restricted in any way. As clever as you are, you may have a tendency to make the same mistakes over and over again because much of your response is glib reaction rather that thoughtful application. You are in a continuous state of flux brought by constantly changing interests.

Your Soul Urge number is: 1
A Soul Urge number of 1 means: Your Soul Urge is the number 1. With a Soul Urge number of 1, you want to lead and direct, to work independent of supervision, by yourself or with subordinates. You take pride in your abilities and want to be recognized for them. You may seek opportunities to display your strength and usefulness, wanting to create and originate. In your desire to manage the big picture and the main issues, you may often leave the details to others.
The positive 1 Soul Urge is Ambitious and determined, a leader seeking opportunities. There is a great deal of honesty and loyalty in this character. If you possess positive 1 Soul Urge qualities, you are very attainment oriented and driven to success. You are a loyal friend and strictly fair in your business dealings.
The negative side of the 1 Soul Urge must be avoided. A negative 1 is apt to dominate situations and people; the home, the spouse, the family and the business. Emotions aren't strong in this nature. If you possess an excess of 1 energy, you may, at times, be boastful and egotistic. You must avoid being too critical and impatient of trifles. The great need of the 1 Soul Urge is the development of friendliness, and a sincere interest in people.

Your Inner Dream number is: 4
An Inner Dream number of 4 means: You dream of being a very solid citizen that people can depend upon. You strive for organization and predictable order. You want to be recognized as a person with a plan and the discipline to make that plan work like clockwork.

* Just for the record, the sites suggests you use the name listed on your birth certificate. I used my married name and coincidentally, it's not like me at all however, it's exactly like Chris!

Birthday Calculator

2005-10-21T11:05:00.000-06:00

Birthday Calculator

You entered: 5/29/1976
Your date of conception was on or about 6 September 1975.
You were born on a Saturday under the astrological sign Gemini.
Your Life path number is 3.
The Julian calendar date of your birth is 2442927.5.
The golden number for 1976 is 1.
The epact number for 1976 is -1.
The year 1976 was a leap year.
As of 10/21/2005 1:03:19 PM CDT you are 29 years old.
You are 353 months old.
You are 1,534 weeks old.
You are 10,737 days old.
You are 257,701 hours old.
You are 15,462,063 minutes old.
You are 927,723,799 seconds old.
There are 220 days till your next birthday on which your cake will have 30 candles.
Those 30 candles produce 30 BTUs,or 7,560 calories of heat (that's only 7.5600 food Calories!) .
You can boil 3.43 US ounces of water with that many candles.
In 1976 there were approximately 3.1 million births in the US.
In 1976 the US population was approximately 203,302,031 people, 57.4 persons per square mile.
In 1976 in the US there were approximately 2,152,662 marriages (10.1%) and 1,036,000 divorces (4.9%).
In 1976 in the US there were approximately 1,921,000 deaths (9.5 per 1000).
Your birthstone is Emerald

The Mystical properties of Emerald:
Though not meant to replace traditional medical treatment, Emerald is used for physical and emotional healing. Some lists consider these stones to be your birthstone. (Birthstone lists come from Jewelers, Tibet, Ayurvedic Indian medicine, and other sources).

Your birth tree is Ash Tree: The Ambition
Uncommonly attractive, vivacious, impulsive, demanding, does not care for criticism, ambitious, intelligent, talented, likes to play with its fate, can be egoistic, very reliable and trustworthy, faithful and prudent lover, sometimes brains rule over heart, but takes partnership very serious.

There are 65 days till Christmas 2005!
The moon's phase on the day you were born was new.

You appear to be visiting from INVERNESS, FLORIDA.

Blaine Larsen, "How Do You Get That Lonely"

2005-10-18T10:36:00.000-06:00

It was just another story written on the second page
Underneath the Tiger's football score
It said he was only eighteen, a boy about my age
They found him face down on the bedroom floor
There'll be services on Friday at the Lawrence Funeral Home
Then out on Mooresville highway, they'll lay him 'neath a stone...

(Chorus)
How do you get that lonely, how do you hurt that bad
To make you make the call, that havin' no life at all
Is better than the life that you had
How do you feel so empty, you want to let it all go
How do you get that lonely... and nobody know

Did his girlfriend break up with him, did he buy or steal that gun?
Did he lose a fight with drugs or alcohol?
Did his Mom and Daddy forget to say I love you son?
Did no one see the writing on the wall?
I'm not blamin' anybody, we all do the best we can
I know hindsight's 20/20, but I still don't understand...

(Chorus)
How do you get that lonely, how do you hurt that bad
To make you make the call, that havin' no life at all
Is better than the life that you had
How do you feel so empty, you want to let it all go
How do you get that lonely... and nobody know

It was just another story printed on the second page
Underneath the Tiger's football score...

In response to my previous post...

2005-10-17T13:29:00.000-06:00

I got called out last night at 8:30pm. Yep, 30 minutes before the start of Desperate Housewives. The first episode I've ever missed. Whew, glad Melissa taped it for me.

Anyway, it was for the suicide death of a 16 year old. Not by drugs this time but by other means.

Reminds me of a song by a young country artist...but I can't think of it now...

Drugs

2005-10-15T18:12:00.000-06:00

I've been thinking, the past couple of days, about something different to blog about. I didn't really come up with anything until just now, when I was checking out google images for "meth users" photos. Yuck. I'm so glad meth wasn't around when I was in high school. Well, maybe it was and I just didn't know it. Either way---it never surfaced it's ugly face in my days and I'm thankful. I'll just leave it at that.

Meth, also known as Methamphetamine, is a highly addictive drug. Statistics show that 97% of users are addicted after only the first time using! I could post fact after fact but I'm not going to. Next time you have nothing better to do than search google images, type "meth users or meth before and after" in your search engine. It's amazing what that drug does to people.

Which, brings me to my next topic. In the past week (literally) I've been called out two times for drug overdoses. The first person was just 20 years old. The second kid was only 16. Both boys. In between those calls we had a 17 year old and a 28 year old, during the course of the same week, both dead from overdoses. Without going into details that I can't really divulge to the world, it appears both are prescription drugs. Cheap, easily accessible, quick high. Not that I'm promoting or even advocating for drug use, but what happened to just plain ol' mary jane?

...Guess she got hooked on meth too.

Thought For The Day...

2005-10-12T07:36:00.000-06:00

Do not walk behind me,
for I may not lead...

Do not walk ahead of me,
for I may not follow...

Do not walk beside me,
for the path is narrow...

In fact, just f**k off and leave me alone.

2005-10-10T17:38:00.000-06:00

Last week I sent Scott an email with a picture of a Michigan personalized license plate on it. It was the block style blue M with "oron" following. I thought it was funny.

Scott,

I thought you would like this picture. (Picture attached--if I can find the picture again I'll update but until then you'll just have to use your imagination.)

xo

Kelly

The reply I received this morning:

Kelly,

I tallied the results...

Nobody in Iraq likes you either.

Scott.

Sad

2005-10-05T17:31:00.000-06:00

I'm starting out with some background on my next post, well, because I like my readers to be somewhat informed when they read my long, drawn out posts! :-P

In April of 2002 Chris and I met my mom and stepdad in New Orleans, as he was there on business. They stayed in this huge, old, historic hotel just off the French Quarter, right downtown. I can't remember the name of it, but Julia Roberts filmed a movie there, but of course, I can't remember the name of that either. The only thing that comes to mind is a lawyer movie. Anyhow, it was during the Jazz Festival and convienently we just happened to be there when JB was "rumored" to be playing at his Margaritaville New Orleans location.

Chris and I woke up early that morning, I want to say it was a Thursday, but I'm not positive. We knew we had a task in front of us, but never imagined it would be so much fun. We arrived at Margaritaville at 10:00am. At the time they weren't confirming the rumors about Jimmy playing there, but security in the area seemed awful tight. Oh--and there was a line that was starting to wrap around the building, which was unusual, since the restaurant and store were both open and somewhat empty. We stood in line while my mom and Gene went and did their own thing. It was hot. Very hot. I think it got up into the upper 90's that day with high humidity. We were dressed Buffett casual, but not at all prepared. I had a camera, but we didn't bring food, drinks, chairs, etc..., and there was no way in hell we were going to lose our place in line, as our chance to see Jimmy up close and personal was slowing presenting itself.

As the day went on we became hungry, grouchy, thirsty and did I say hot? We met these really great people we stood in line with. The people in front of us were all doing their residency at the University Hospital in New Orleans. Some were ER docs and a couple were ENT's. They were about our age, so that was fun hanging out with them. Through the course of the afternoon we met the people right behind us in line, Susie and Ralph. This couple was in their 40's, at least, and very high energy and in great spirits, considering the surroundings. They were from Mississippi (if my memory serves me correctly) and were also in NOLA visiting. We talked with them for the duration of...oh about ten hours and eventually walked in with them and surprisingly, my mom and Gene, who held out to see Jimmy.

Once we got in, between 8-9pm, hot, sticky and smelling ripe I'm sure, we were about 10 feet back from the stage, right smack dab in front of Jimmy himself. We saw Sus and Ralph, but in the midst of the chaotic crowd it seems like we lost them. Oh, and when I say chaotic I'm using that term lightly. The fans and, well, not so much "fans", were crammed in like sardines. People were stepping on each other, pushing, drunk and disorderly and just being obnoxious. My mom and Gene eventually left after about the first 20 minutes of the "show". Being pretty much die hard fans we stuck through it and ate when we left, which was close to 11pm. (Oh, and just for the record, I got and orange lei before we went in and threw it to Carlton, Jimmy's big black bodyguard, who placed it on the stage. Jimmy picked it up and wore it! It was so great! I have pictures on disk somewhere, but couldn't find them tonight. That is--if they were salvaged from our water disaster last year.) Anyway, we exchanged email addresses with Susie and Ralph and promised to meet up again.

We kept in touch with Susie and Ralph up until hurricane season of last year, when our computer took a bath and we lost most of the information stored on the hard drive. We didn't hear back form them again, but thought of them often. We especially thought of them during the Hurricane Katrina disaster, remembering they lived in the Mississippi/Alabama areas. I actually posted a message about them on Parrotkey, as far as trying to get the info off my hard drive for their email address, but again, didn't get around to doing the "dirty work".

I got an email from Ralph this afternoon. He was checking to see how we were doing and if we still had the same email address since we had lost touch. He told us he had some sad news, which immediately made me wonder about the Hurricanes and if it affected them. Sadly, his wife Susan passed away suddenly and unexpectedly from complications of a stroke this past June. I took this news incredibly hard, but I'm not sure why. Typically, when it comes to death, unless it's a close friend's family or my family I'm not too emotional, but for whatever reason this time I was. As I read Chris the email over the phone I couldn't control the tears. I think it's a guilt feeling, especially knowing the thought was there but there was no initiative taken on my part to try to hook up with them or even check on them after Katrina.

Below, I'm attaching the email for you to see and as a reminder of how fragile life is and not to forget to tell those friends that you don't see often or talk to as often as you like how important they are to you.

I'm not sure if this is still your same email address but if it is I wanted to say hello and pass along some sad news from my home. My wife, Susan, passed away suddenly in June, it was totally unexpected, she had a stroke that got complicated and we lost her. We often talked about our chance meeting with you guys, and we both thought you guys were great, so I just wanted to pass this news on to you. Hope you are well and I wish you all the best with your new family members. Take care, Ralph

I Love Sundays!

2005-10-03T08:33:00.000-06:00

Sunday used to be my least favorite day of the week...it always meant that I had to wake up early the next morning and start another long week of school. The music on the radio was different on Sunday, TV showed Westerns, which I found to be completely boring and it seemed everything was always rushed Sunday nights, in preparation for Monday and the rest of the week.

Not anymore! I love Sundays, but only in the fall. I really like cleaning on Sundays, usually Sunday morning. Sunday is also a Bob Evans day--mmmm, crepes. Actually, I'm almost sick of their crepes, but shhh! Don't tell anyone! I really like fall Sundays because the windows can be open with a light warm breeze blowing in, filling the house with clean, crisp smells. Well, not really in Florida, especially since it's October 3rd and supposed to be 90 degrees today, but that's neither here nor there.

Sunday is also a good day for baking. I love making fall treats on Sunday--I guess so I can take some into work for the following week. I'm not sure why Sunday is a good baking day for me, it just is. I made harvest apple cupcakes yesterday. Yum, they were good too.

OOH, and I must not forget Sunday TV. Desperate Housewives and Grey's Anatomy. Don't ask me to stay up until 11 on any night but Sunday (or maybe Saturday night at the P. Cafe, but no other days!)

I'm already counting down to next Sunday!

The stress level is rising

2005-09-29T07:10:00.000-06:00

Is it because of an important case that's coming up? NO...

Is it because of an important meeting coming up? NO...

Maybe because of a finance? NOPE...

It's because on Saturday, October 1st at 12:00pm Michigan State plays Michigan in East Lansing.

I won't be there.

I might watch it on TV if it's televised here. Probably not, though.

You know it's going to be a bad day when...

2005-09-27T07:22:00.000-06:00

1. You wake up 20 minutes late (every minute counts!), go to iron your clothes and plug in the mixer instead of the iron. But what's worse is you don't notice until you check back to see if the iron is hot enough and it's not even hot...because it's the mixer.

2. You drop your curling iron while curling your hair, narrowly missing your foot, breaking the shaft and handle into pieces after it hits the tile floor. (For the 3rd day in a row)

3. You see at your 5 year old's elementary school that they're having tacos for lunch. You start craving tacos. You come to work and see that the morning Buffett boards are dedicated to "Taco Tuesday". It must be a sign---Mexican food is in store for the day. You skip going to the gym to go to Los Whatever the name of the Mexican restaurant is and they're "closed for repairs". :(

To Be Continued...

The Voice Within

2005-09-23T19:49:00.000-06:00

My friend Crime Dog's future daughter in law sang this song during a karaoke contest. I LOVE the song and wish I could have heard her, because from what I understand she rocked the house. I'm posting the lyrics to this song for two reasons. 1. This is the perfect description of what Chris' promotion to Crimes Against Children Detective will hold for the future (sadly) and 2. This is the perfect example of the services we provide as Victim Advocates. I hope this song will reach you like it does me (and many, many child victims we work with on a daily basis). ~Kelly~

The Voice Within
By: Christina Aguilera

Young girl don’t cry
I’ll be right here when your world starts to fall
Young girl it’s alright
Your tears will dry, you’ll soon be free to fly
When you’re safe inside your room you tend to dream
Of a place where nothing’s harder than it seems
No one ever wants or bothers to explain
Of the heartache life can bring and what it means

Chorus:
When there’s no one else, look inside yourself
Like your oldest friend just trust the voice within
Then you’ll find the strength that will guide your way
You’ll learn to begin to trust the voice within
Young girl don’t hide
You’ll never change if you just run away
Young girl just hold tight
Soon you’re gonna see your brighter day

Now in a world where innocence is quickly claimed
It’s so hard to stand your ground when you’re so afraid
No one reaches out a hand for you to hold
When you look outside look inside to your soul

Chorus

Life is a journey
It can take you anywhere you choose to go
As long as you’re learning
You’ll find all you’ll ever need to know
(be strong)
You’ll break it
(hold on)
You’ll make it
Just don’t forsake it because
No one can tell you what you can’t do
No one can stop you, you know that I’m talking to you

Chorus

Young girl don’t cry
I’ll be right here when your world starts to fall

If you liked what you read, you can listen to it here.

Conversation with the Red Cross

2005-09-23T19:31:00.000-06:00

Red Cross: Hello, how can we help you?

Me: Hi, this is Kelly from the ____ ____ Sheriff's Office. I'm calling in reference to a family who lost their home and all possesions as the result of a house fire. They have no insurance.

RC: Ok, tell me where it's at.

Me: It's at _____ _____ address.

RC: Ok, let me transfer you to our coordinator.

Me: Ok. On hold.

Me: (Thinking to myself) Geeze, did they put me on hold or on ignore?

RC: Hello, this is so & so, can I help you.

Me: Uhh, yes...I'm calling about the house fire (re-explain what I told the first lady)

RC: Ok, do they have a place to stay for the night?

Me: Yes, they have a place for the night but are unsure as far as after tomorrow.

RC: Ok, so what do you want us to do?

Me: (IN SHOCK) Umm, what do you mean? I am calling the Red Cross, right?

RC: Yes, but I have to call in some volunteers if they need help.

Me: (Getting adgitated) Ok, start calling, they're going to need some assistance.

RC: Can I talk to the victims?

Me: (handing the phone over) "Hello" he says. Hi, this is the RC, what can we help you with? "Well, I'm not really sure, I'm standing here watching my house burn...(it's literally still in flames), I guess with whatever help you provide. I'm still in shock.

RC: Ok Mr. so & so (they say the wrong last name) we'll try to find some help for you...

Well, the victim hands the phone back to me in complete confusion. Now, I'm pissed, to say the least. WTF is the Red Cross for, if they're not willing to help? I've dealt with the Red Cross many times when they respond within 24 hours with food, clothing, gift cards, etc...I mean, this family did not have insurance...they needed help! I understand that the Red Cross itself is pretty taxed right now, but they must remember their community roots and without this community, they may not have the volunteers and finances they have to help others.

Spaghetti

2005-09-22T19:00:00.000-06:00

I was coming home from work when I got called to assist a family who fell victim to a stucture fire. I called Chris to tell him I was going to be late and I would call him as soon as I cleared. As soon as I was on my way home I called Melissa to tell her we knew the vic's of the fire and to go over the details (and my not-so-good experience with the Red Cross--but that's a different post). She was at my house picking up a dress she's letting the daughter of a DV victim wear for her homecoming, as they are poor. Anyway...she is telling me my husband is making spaghetti for dinner but needs me to pick up something he's missing. So--I'm thinking garlic, mushrooms, onion, something like that. What does he need me to get??? Sauce! Yep...sauce, that minor detail he forgot. Melissa and I thought that was pretty funny until he gets to his second request...angel hair pasta! Ok, so let me get this straight--he's missing sauce and spaghetti? So....how did he come up with the idea to make spaghetti, anyway? It was pretty funny and I'm sure it was much funnier if you actually witnessed the conversation.